Some of the best lessons I鈥檝e learned lately are from the incredibly smart Mel Robbins.
Her 鈥淟et Them鈥 theory has gone viral.
It goes to the tune of this: If someone is not kind to you, let them be unkind. If they lie to you, let them. If someone wrongs you in any way, let them. And so on.
But it isn鈥檛 over there. Next, Robbins says you tell yourself, 鈥淟et me.鈥
Most of the time, that would mean let me decide how I鈥檓 going to respond; let me decide how I鈥檒l react or how I鈥檒l remove myself from the situation.
Her point in this theory: The only thing we have control over is how we respond 鈥 the way we speak to others, the way we act, the way we talk.
And, of course, she encourages folks to be kind, have strong morals and/or faith, be good parents and good people in general, etc. , etc. It鈥檚 important to add that this theory isn鈥檛 intended to let people walk all over you or use you. That鈥檚 why the 鈥渓et me鈥 part is key.
My recent let-me moments have come when I鈥檝e gathered myself to handle one of my three-year-old鈥檚 tantrums. Instead of being angry that she won鈥檛 snap out of it, I met her with love and hugs. When true colors come out in relationships, I鈥檓 thankful 鈥 and I remove myself instead of allowing people to cross boundaries. And when someone cuts me off in traffic, I let them go. They are in a bigger hurry than I am.
This tough yet simple lesson is so freeing. Believe it or not, it helps us create space to be better people.
Learning and practicing this theory doesn鈥檛 mean we don鈥檛 care about others or are selfish. It means that we aren鈥檛 going to allow ourselves to have less than we deserve in relationships, in life, in careers, in friendships, in our dreams and passions.
Why am I sharing this? (I know, it鈥檚 not my usual newspaper-business talk, but in the hopes of helping people become better communicators, I believe this is important to share.)
This theory has helped guide me through life the last year or so. It has changed the way I think. It has changed the way I respond. It has helped me navigate my purpose, motherhood and my always-developing career as a communicator.
And I wanted to share it with you, particularly after I came across this quote from Robbins on Instagram. It鈥檚 from page 297 of her book about the theory.
鈥淵ou are responsible for your own happiness.
You are responsible for the energy you bring and how you show up.
You are responsible for defining what matters to you.
You are responsible for telling the truth even when it鈥檚 really hard.
You are responsible for paying for your life.
You are responsible for waking up every day and doing the work to make progress on what matters.
Nobody owes you anything, but you owe yourself everything.鈥
Genius.
Your power lives in the decisions you make for your life, including how you respond to the way others treat you.
And as soon as I digested this theory, my outlook on life changed 鈥 tenfold.
(Hannah Strong Oskin is the former executive editor of My Horry 糖心vlog官方入口.)
(0) comments
Welcome to the discussion.
Log In
Keep it Clean. Please avoid obscene, vulgar, lewd, racist or sexually-oriented language.
PLEASE TURN OFF YOUR CAPS LOCK.
Don't Threaten. Threats of harming another person will not be tolerated.
Be Truthful. Don't knowingly lie about anyone or anything.
Be Nice. No racism, sexism or any sort of -ism that is degrading to another person.
Be Proactive. Use the 'Report' link on each comment to let us know of abusive posts.
Share with Us. We'd love to hear eyewitness accounts, the history behind an article.